Don't Ask, Don't Bore

The other day, Robb and I were watching the House Hearing on Don't Ask, Don't Tell on CSPAN. Those Representatives are really boring. If you've ever wondered why it takes Congress so long to accomplish what little they do, you only need to watch one of these sessions on CSPAN. Speaker after speaker on things not even remotely connected to the item on which they're about to vote. And the amount of paper they waste is astounding, because every time one of them speaks about something, it's written down. After they speak, the paper from which they spoke is presented to the secretary. I assume it is then recorded as some kind of 'exhibit' which goes to the Congressional archives. So, this meaningless crap is going to cost even more time and money, because it will have to be recorded in the Archives, and then someone has to find a place for it and that has to be recorded somewhere. I'll bet the government could save millions every year if these people would stick to the issues, without all the grandstanding.
Gates tells U.S. troops: no gay ban repeal imminent

Exercise in a pill? Drugs show promise in mice

This is just sick and definitely 'Big Brother': UK Children, 4, ‘to be fingerprinted to borrow school books from library’

Senators Propose Mandatory IDs For Prepaid Cell Phones

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral , OK? What school did you go to?

WITNESS: Oral.

A calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “I would like to buy some cyanide.”

The pharmacist asked, “Why in the world do you need cyanide?”

The lady replied, “I need it to poison my husband.”

The pharmacist’s eyes got big and he exclaimed, “Lord have mercy! I can’t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That’s against the law! I’ll lose my license! They’ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!”

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist’s wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, “Well now, that’s different. You didn’t tell me you had a prescription.”

À la prochaine, mes amis

Non-Events

The non-events of our existence continue. Nothing at all going on. No arguments with crazy neighbors, no notes taped to doors, no confrontations. Just quiet.

Did exploding stars shatter life's mirror? MR SPOCK is dying. Fortunately for the crew of the USS Enterprise, the Spock in question is not the real one, but an evil mirror-image version created in a freak transporter malfunction. This Spock's back-to-front body can digest only right-handed amino acids; meanwhile, like all organic matter, the food around him is made of left-handed amino acids. He is starving in the midst of plenty.

This plot line from the 1970 novel Spock Must Die! - the first literary spin-off from the Star Trek TV series - highlights one of life's fundamental mysteries. Why does biology use only one of two mirror-image forms in which most complex molecules can occur? The latest pop at an answer weaves astrophysics, particle physics and biochemistry into a startling proposal: that the stellar explosions known as supernovae are to blame. Read full article.

'Impossible motion' trick wins Illusion Contest.

REMOVING a chemical "invisibility cloak" that makes HIV-infected cells look healthy might be the key to ridding people of the virus.

Human cells protect themselves against immune attack by displaying proteins on their surface that mark them as "self". When the immune system detects these proteins, it holds back. One way HIV evades immune attack is by hijacking one of these proteins - CD59 - and using it to disguise itself and the cells it infects as healthy, human cells. Read full article.

Texas schools to get controversial syllabus. Education officials in the US state of Texas have adopted new guidelines to the school curriculum, which critics say will politicise teaching. The changes include teaching that the UN could be a threat to American freedom, and that the Founding Fathers may not have intended a complete separation of church and state. Read full article.

Scientists in China have broken the record for quantum teleportation, achieving a distance of about 10 miles, according to a new study in Nature Photonics. That's a giant leap from previous achievements. Read full article.

Revealed: how Israel offered to sell South Africa nuclear weapons Exclusive: Secret apartheid-era papers give first official evidence of Israeli nuclear weapons

ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?

WITNESS: All of them.. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

Church Bulletins: Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Jupiter Tree

Here is our picture in the South Florida Gay News. In case you don't recognize us, we're fourth from the bottom, or the last picture on the right, depending on which version comes up.. Click on it to make it larger

This tree had been providing shade for at least the fifteen years we've lived here, and judging by its size, a lot longer than that. Now, it appears to be quite dead. Apparently, the long, cold winter we just suffered was the cause of its demise.

The nutcase has taken to calling me at various times during the day, usually in the morning. The first couple of times I answered the call, but he never says anything, so I now have his calls on "silent", which means the phone doesn't ring, but I get a notification of a missed call. His new strategy is probably not a good idea since I frequently don't go to bed sometimes until 3:00 and 4:00AM, which would be the middle of his sleeping perod. You can see where this is going, right?

I was trying to watch some videos on You Tube and it occurred to me how stupid are the people who advertise there. Oh yeah, I'd much rather read those annoying ads than watch the video I wanted to see. Thankfully, there are alternatives to You Tube.

Speaking of alternatives to You Tube, here is a great video that will let you see some of the things we'll be seeing in Frankfurt, hopefully in August.

WASHINGTON — Since the Deepwater Horizon oil drilling rig exploded on April 20, the Obama administration has granted oil and gas companies at least 27 exemptions from doing in-depth environmental studies of oil exploration and production in the Gulf of Mexico. Read the full article.

Companies Dodge $60 Billion in Taxes.

I LOVE this: World's First Gold Vending Machine.

Babies know the difference between good and evil at six months, study reveals.

This has to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Are Your Children Playing With Lucifer's Testicles?

Jupiter loses a stripe. Jupiter has lost one of its prominent stripes, leaving its southern half looking unusually blank. Scientists are not sure what triggered the disappearance of the band.

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?

WITNESS: By death..

ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

WITNESS: Take a guess

Church Bulletins:

The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: 'Break Forth Into Joy.'

À la prochaine, mes amis

Nutcase Gossip

Something to relax you:

I had a confrontation with the nutcase on the second floor. He left another of his "anonymous" notes on several doors on the third floor, complaining about someone moving furniture. So, I wrote on the back of his note, my note: "There is a nutcase on the second floor who persists in leaving anonymous notes on my door". There was a bit more but that was the main theme. He then brought that note up and taped it to my door. I wrote: As long as you got the message (which he obviously hadn't) and taped it to his door. Somehow, he managed to come out, find the note and accosted me in the hallway before I could even make it back to my place. Apparently, he took offense at the word "nutcase", but then promptly proved it to be valid by threatening to call the police and the IRS. The IRS? Excuse me while I take a minute to stop laughing. Then followed that by wishing death for me and Robb by some means that I didn't hear because I was laughing. Needless to say, my laughter only enraged him further, and he left in a huff while calling me an "asshole".

Saturday was the day that letter carriers and others collect food for the poor. Robb and I were wondering how the government can spend billions on an illegal war, but can not take care of the homeless and hungry.

More gossip. In the ongoing saga of Geoff The Enraged, he is now pretty much not speaking to anyone. Perhaps the nutcase on the second floor and, maybe Pascal, but I'm not sure about that because Pascal is a member of the Board of Directors. Geoff was on the BOD but got pissed at something, sent them all a nasty email and resigned from the Board.

If you want to make the degree symbol (400°), hold down the left Alt Key and type 248. It also works if you type 0176.

Hawking: Time travel will happen. In a new documentary series for the Discovery Channel, Stephen Hawking has already considered how man might truly conquer space. Or, indeed, how spacemen might come down to our meager Earth and dismember us as so much fast food. Read more.

Currently reading - God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything by Christopher Hitchens. I couldn't agree more.

Rekers Paid $60K for Gay Adoption Testimony. Rekers, a cofounder of the Family Research Council, is now ensnared in controversy for hiring a gay male escort to assist him on a European trip. I would have bet money on that.

Frankincense: Could it be a cure for cancer? Scientists have observed that there is some agent within frankincense which stops cancer spreading, and which induces cancerous cells to close themselves down. Mahmoud Suhail is trying to find out what this is.

Energy drinks work as soon as they touch your tongue.

See Better by Believing You Can. "Eyesight markedly improved when people were experimentally induced to believe that they could see especially well, Langer and her colleagues report in the April Psychological Science. Such expectations actually enhanced visual clarity, rather than simply making volunteers more alert or motivated to focus on objects, they assert."

Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad says he has 'documented evidence' that Washington and Israel are linked to leading terrorist organizations in the world. US root of global terror: Ahmadinejad.

Bill Maher - Just went to the Smithsonian natural history museum in D C - getting those huge dinos on the ark - man that Noah was good!

Dark matter claims thrown into doubt by new data. Previous claims that dark matter had been detected are being called into doubt now that a powerful new experiment has failed to see any of the elusive particles. Read more.

Church Bulletins:

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Twenty-One

Because it's Lara Fabian and I love her voice.

And just to prove how find behind the rest of the world the, according to Republicans, best country in the world, is in health care: What Cuba Can Teach Us About Health Care.

We were worried about Bush starting WWIII. We should be worried about Obummer. Obama Revives Rumsfeld’s Missile Scheme, Risks Nuke War.

Jesus, talk about arrogance: Goldman boss Lloyd Blankfein denies moral obligation towards client. I guess that means the Republicans are right, we definitely do not need financial regulation!

Innovation: One web language to rule them all. "How would you like to have just one all-powerful program on your computer? No cluttered "start" menu or "dock" to make your selection from, just one icon to click that opens up a window capable of any task you may require."

Arctic warming likely to reverse - scientist.

New animal species discovered in Borneo

Tailor-making cancer treatments. Cancer researchers in Berlin are working on a genome sequencing project. It promises an individualized approach to a disease that still defies complete medical comprehension.

Gene silencing prevents its first human disease.

Scientists make cancer cells vanish!

And you say you still believe in the Catholic church? Child sex `no breach of virtue’, some priests believe.

Why didn't the melons get married?

Because they cantaloupe!

ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: How many were boys?

WITNESS: None.

ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

WITNESS: Your Honor , I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

À la prochaine, mes amis

September Oktoberfest

Robb kind of solved our Frankfurt lodging dilemma, but we had to settle for a hotel. The good news is that it's right in the heart of the city, so we can walk to almost everything. It will be interesting to tour what used to be considered the main drag: Kaiserstrasse. Last time we were there, it was basically the heart of the red-light district. Since that was only a few years ago, probably nothing has changed. We shall see. When I was stationed in Frankfurt back in the fifties, Kaiserstrasse was the main street to which we all went. It was lined with beer stubes with oompah bands and crowded with people who obviously had downed a stein or two. Too bad we're going to be too early for Oktoberfest. Since we'll be there until 3 September, and since Oktoberfest is really in September, we might get to experience it for a couple days. I wonder why it's called "Oktoberfest" and not Septemberfest?

Thursday was, apparently, Earth Day. Our ex-neighbor, but still friend, Alan started a free public transportation service called Green Hopper. Green Hopper has two objectives; 1 - lower the number of fume spewing vehicles on the city streets and 2 - lower the number of drunk drivers on the city streets. Since its inception a year or so ago, it has been embraced by the community and it's not uncommon to see a Green Hopper driving by. Each year, on Earth Day, they have a little party at the Green Hopper headquarters. This year, since we're both healthy for a change, we went. I was quite surprised by the number of people who showed up for this event. I was thinking, "Maybe a handful." But there was a huge crowd. Furthermore, I seem to be on a winning roll for the moment. You know I won the free trip to Paris. Well, today I not only won a door prize (a bottle of champagne, no less), but after years and years of watching others get their picture in the local gay newspapers, today was my turn. Robb and I are in the South Florida Gay News. Now if the good luck streak would just extend to the Powerball.....

Is there any better proof that legislation is needed to protect gay men and women? You should be firing off letters and emails of indignation just from reading the headline: Sonoma County CA separates elderly gay couple and sells all of their worldly possessions.

If you think we're being ripped off by the TV, telephone, and internet ISPs, you need to read this: "the U.S. is the only industrialized nation that taxes its overseas citizens, subjecting them to taxation in both their country of citizenship and country of residence." Why More U.S. Expatriates Are Turning In Their Passports. Speaking of telephones, once again Europe moves ahead of the US in technology. Orange (ex France Telecom) is currently installing new public phones in the street They're doing that in some specific, touristic areas as an experiment. Why? Because these telephone booths have nothing to do with the good old pay phones of "the past"! This new model allows you to call, of course, but also to surf the web or find a restaurant/shop/theater nearby.

More telephone news. This just blows me away: Quad Band Bluetooth Touch Screen FM Watch Cell Phone. I had absolutely no idea there was such a thing.

Lousy DNA Reveals When People First Wore Clothes.

Here's an interesting theory: Self-starter: Life got going all on its own.

Of course, we will never see it in our lifetimes: Quantum broadband becomes reality.

RIP Xena. Last but not least, the first pig cloned from fetal pigskin cells in Japan, Xena, has been euthanized after difficulty standing due to natural causes, reports Kyodo News. Xena was nine years and eight months at the time of her death, the oldest cloned pig in the world.

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No , this is how I dress when I go to work.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher

À la prochaine, mes amis

Wake Up Sonata

I'm feeling a lot better, but there's very little else going on in our lives at the moment. We are wondering if the Iceland volcano is going to interfere with our trip to Europe this year. That does bring up a point about which we're also concerned. We very much wanted to spend some time in Germany this year, but it seems that German accomodations are even more expensive than Paris. The available sites for apartments are extremely limited and those that are presented, are very expensive. We're thinking about cutting out the German portion of the trip, even though we've already made our travel arrangements and it will probably end up costing us to make the changes we propose. I don't really see why it should be a problem, we're not even thinking about leaving until August. That should be more than enough time to re-sell our seats. They've probably over sold the flight anyway. They usually do.

Will Americans EVER wake up to how badly they're being ripped off? "In the last couple of years an Internet connection through a land line has become very reasonable in cost. We now use Neuf Telecom for our phone and Internet connection. For 29.90 euros ($40.34) a month, we have a ADSL line, 70 TV channels, and free phone calls to French fixed lines and to many other countries including the US. We call to the US, to both fixed and cell phones, for free. They do charge for calls to US 800 numbers. Several other companies offer the same type of service." For that exact service, I'm paying almost $200 per month, and I don't have any premium TV channels. My ISP is Comcast and they're getting worse and worse with each passing month. I won't even discuss the telephone ripoff.

And Speaking of Americans waking up: Health Buzz: Health Insurers Invest in Fast Food.

Could I be any more surprised? Secret US memo urges war on Iran!

Cassini Captures First Video of Extraterrestrial Lightning

Video: Get a Closer Look at GM’s Electric Pod Car

The pill: secret of immortality Several readers noticed two inspiring sentences in the London free newspaper Metro last month. An article on the contraceptive pill assured: "Taking the pill cuts the long-term risk of dying from any serious illness including cancers and heart disease, new research suggests. Women who take the contraceptive are 12 per cent less likely to die compared with those who never have." Sarah Fellows asks: "If the entire female population began taking the pill, would a lucky 12 per cent of us become immortal? We think this kind of side effect would surely be worth investigating further and can't understand why pharmaceutical companies have not caught on to it."

This has to be one of the funniest ideas I've ever encountered: Shoes for people who want to run barefoot but don't want to do it without wearing shoes. I wonder how many millions they've sold? Barefoot Running Without Freaky Footwear

Confucius Says: War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

ATTORNEY: The youngest son , the 20-year-old , how old is he?

WITNESS: He's 20 , much like your IQ.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Abbreviated

After Robb's stomach problems, he contracted some kind of bug which I managed to fight off for a week or so, before it finally got me. I stupidly figured I could overcome it without going to the doctor. Obviously, I was wrong.....again. So this is going to be a very abbreviated post.

Is anyone paying attention? An American metropolis where eyes are everywhere.

Confucius Says: Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's.. Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

IDIOT SIGHTING #4: My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimum lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Ricky Crisis

Okay, gossip time. You've seen the name Geoff on here several times, and you know we consider him a friend. What you didn't know is that Geoff is a bit of a loose wire. He frequently gets pissed at us for reasons that no other person in the world would find annoying, and will not speak to us for sometimes a couple of weeks to a few months. Then, one day, he'll show up at our door as though nothing ever happened, which in our opinion is true. We have come to another of those incidents. At his urging, I purchased an antenna to pick up HD signals on my TV. But the antenna only picks up local stations. Robb and I don't watch much TV, but when we do, it's usually CNN, MSNBC or the Comedy Channel. About the only regular watching we do is during football season. Needless to say, even though the picture is really great with the HD antenna, it isn't practical for us because, except for football season, we don't watch the local channels. For reasons that still don't make sense to me, Geoff became incensed at that. He shouted at us and walked out, slamming the door behind him. A few minutes later, we got the usual "I hate you. You're typical Americans and I want nothing to do with either of you" email. We're not so sure we want anything more to do with him, either, but we'll see how it works out this time. We have a new friend named Pascal, who was born and raised in Paris but now lives here. He also has suffered the Geoff tirade and was profoundly shocked at such behavior. Of course, they are once again best friends because the cooling period has passed.

Is this not the coolest shower curtain?

10 water powered cars.

I thought this picture of Obama editing his speech was very interesting. It just keeps getting better, doesn't it? Obama to allow gas and oil drilling off Virginia coast. The conspiracy people are already talking about Obama as being hand-picked for the job. I'm beginning to believe them.

"Health premiums could rise 17 pct for young adults" The insurance industry has only four years to line their pockets, surely you didn't think they were just going to sit by and let this opportunity pass them by?

Catholics find ties to the church tested by crisis. I don't understand all the fuss. You mean, just because a "man of God" stands in front of you, extolling the virtues of morality and then goes back to his office where he fondles the altar boy du jour, you're going to doubt him? Next thing you know, someone will say you have to be really stupid to be Catholic.

Auto industry group spent $1.4M on lobbying in 4Q. Excuse me, isn't this the same industry we bailed out with about 15 BILLION dollars?

Ricky Martin Comes Out. Is anyone else shocked?

PINOCCHIO had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened.

A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?"

Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"

À la prochaine, mes amis

Reese's Universe

While perusing the aisles at K-Mart the other day while waiting for Robb to get the medicine he needed for his stomach problems, I came across this lip balm. Reese's Pieces Lip Balm? I don't ordinarily use lip balm, but you know I had to try it. So I did. It really does taste like Reese's Pieces. And there were even more like it. Sodas, candies, cookies, cakes; you name it and it was represented.

By the way, if you were wondering about the taste of the crémant we brought back from France, it was almost as good as Veuve Clicquot. We've also tried, since we've been back, La Grande Dame. It's a much more expensive champagne by Veuve Clicquot. We didn't like it as much as the regular champagne at a quarter of the price. Crémant costs about a third as much as Veuve Clicquot, at least the stuff we get locally. In France, of course, it's even less expensive because they don't have to pay to import it.

It’s True: Hot Water Really Can Freeze Faster Than Cold Water

US Lawmakers Eyeing National ID Card. You should be very scared.

New Proof Unknown "Structures" Tug at Our Universe

Dawn of the Anthropocene Epoch?

By 2005, information was doubling every 36 months.

By 2008, information was doubling every 11 months.

By 2010, information was doubling every 11 hours.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?

WITNESS: No , I just lie there.

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

À la prochaine, mes amis

New Computers

NOTE TO MONITOR MANUFACTURERS: If I wanted a mirror, I would buy one.

Robb and I both bought new computers. His is this desktop Asus. Mine is this Acer laptop. He now has to get used to the differences between XP and Vista, his new OS. I now have Windows 7 on both computers, my HP desktop and the new Acer laptop. My old laptop was an Acer also, and I really liked it. so when I had the chance to upgrade, I took it. The old one (which I gave to Robb) has a 17" screen, the new one has a 17.3" screen.

We got a new laundry company. We should have bought our own equipment, but the board decided to go with another company instead. The laundry equipment is new (although they are the same make and model as the old equipment) and so is the new,higher cost. The new machines work with a card (like a credit card) to which you must add money via a machine. Sort of like an ATM but you put money in instead of getting money out.

New Doctor Who !!!

Scary stuff: U.S. history textbooks could soon be flavored heavily with Texas conservatism.

Osama bin Laden will never face trial in the United States. One wonders when these people are going to admit that Bin Laden is already dead and has been for several years.

A group of 40 year old buddies discuss where they should meet for dinner.

> Finally it is agreed they should meet at the Gausthof zum Löwen restaurant because the waitress's there have low cut blouses and nice breasts.

> 10 years later, at 50 years of age, the group again discusses where they should meet. Finally it is agreed they should meet at the Gausthof zum Löwen because the food there is very good and they have a fine wine selection.

> 10 years later at 60 years of age, the group again discusses where they should meet. Finally it is agreed they should meet at the Gausthof zum Löwen because they can eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant is smoke free.

> 10 years later, at 70 years of age, the group again discusses where they should meet. Finally it is agreed they should meet at the Gausthof zum Löwen because the restaurant is wheel chair accessible and they even have an elevator.

> 10 years later, at 80 years of age, the group again discusses where they should meet. Finally it is agreed they should meet at the Gausthof zum Löwen because they have never been there before.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Big News

WOW!!! BIG NEWS!!! I just won a FREE round-trip flight to Paris on OpenSkies, a business-class-only airline. OpenSkies started operation as L'Avion. We flew with them to Paris the summer of 2008. The problem is that it's only one ticket, so Robb would have to buy one. Then, we would have to fly to New York, because they only offer service between New York and Paris (or Amsterdam), though I've seen they are planning to fly from DC also one of these days. I was very excited to win something for the first time in my life, and fired off all the information they wanted. Then, it occurred to me that it was very possibly a phishing scam, so I spent the rest of the night worrying about that. Finally, the next day (Thursday), I got up and forwarded the email to OpenSkies and asked if it was real or a scam. Hallelujah, they replied that it was indeed a legitmate email and I had really won a round-trip ticket to Paris.

Monday, Robb and I drove down to Miami Beach because his cousins were in town visiting their mother. Okay, their mother is really Robb's cousin, the others are her daughters and I don't know what to call them. Elandra lives in Texas. Claudia lives in New Jersey. They're usually really nice ladies, but Monday evening, they did nothing but rant and rave about their other sister (who of course was not present). After the first hour, I wanted to tell them to shut the f--k up. I didn't, but it was not an enjoyable evening and when we finally left around 11 PM, I had a raging headache. I told Robb I hope I don't have to go through anything like that for a long, long time.

Singalong-a sulcus: How brains hear music and lyrics.

If, like me, you hate to sit through all those trailers on your DVD, here's a trick from CNET.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Church Bulletins

Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Positive Two-fer

I really LOVE two-fers. We went to the market today needing bleach. The first thing we spotted was a two-fer on Doritos. Actually, Robb spotted it after I had grabbed just one bag. Then, we went to get the bleach and son-of-a-gun, another two-fer.


There is a guy in our building, on the second floor, who we've recently discovered is a genuine nutcase. He seems like an affable guy, and in person, he is. But everytime something annoys him, no matter how trivial, he will post a note about it. For awhile, notes were appearing all over the place and no one knew from whence they were coming. Then, one day, he was caught in the act. He was never told, so he has no idea that we know it's him, which makes the whole thing even funnier....to me anyway.


Speaking of loonies in our complex.....there was a couple living down the hall who were evicted yesterday. I didn't know the husband, but the wife seemed like a really nice person. Turns out, neither were very nice and they were about the closest thing to trailer trash I've ever met. For months, things had been disappearing from the lobby and no one could figure out where it was going. Upon checking the apartment after they were evicted, most of the stuff was found to be there.

A measure for the multiverse - the first hint that parallel worlds reallly exist.

How Black Holes Overcome Centrifugal Force to Suck in Gas.


Robot learns to crawl using artificial muscles. It won't be much longer before the Cylons are here.


Microsoft CEO: Google merits regulatory scrutiny. I agree but, can we say "Pot calling the kettle black"?


Stimulus money goes overseas.


Two atoms are walking down the street together. The first atom turns and says, "Hey, you just stole an electron from me!"


"Are you sure?" asks the second atom.


To which the first atom replies, "Yeah, I'm positive!"


À la prochaine, mes amis

Squash Education

Squash update. We ate the other half of the acorn squash, but this time I nuked it. It was perfectly done and took only ten minutes. Robb is having health problems (he has no insurance since he retired) so we have been eating a lot of soft vegetables and very little spice. Our doctor gave him ten days worth of antibiotics, which was finished on Friday, but he doesn't feel that much better. He had to have a CAT scan which cost quite a bit, but luckily, he discovered that Florida has some kind of medical payback plan for former government employees, which includes county employees, so he should get most of it back. He also discovered that our doctor charges only half as much if you don't have insurance. That's all very good for those without insurance, but the rest of us are paying for it with higher and higher insurance premiums. As you know, I have Medicare which is basically free. But Medicare only pays 80% of the bill. You must have Medicare Part B to pay the other 20%. Part B is supplied through a private insurance company (I have AvMed) and is NOT free and they just raised the payment for that. I really don't know how much it is, though I think it's a little over a hundred a month now. If you have Social Security, it is taken out of your monthly allowance. I have never received an SS payment without that deduction, so I don't really miss it. But the point is, my Part B deduction is rising because of doctors who charge more for patients with insurance coverage, and if you only have private insurance, your premiums are rising even higher.

WASHINGTON (AP) - Surviving five heart attacks makes former Vice President Dick Cheney pretty unusual - showing that he has good medical care as well as a particularly aggressive form of heart disease. The really important thing to consider here is that this is the exact same health care the government provides for everyone. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Speaking of health care, I think I have a solution. Of course, it will never happen for several reasons, not the least of which is the inability of Americans to get off their collective asses and do something. But, if we were to revolt and tell Congress that they can only have the same health coverage as the rest of us, I guarantee you would see a comprehensive plan passed unanimously within an hour.

The big news today is that Obama wants to pour $900 million into the public school system. He might as well pour it down a toilet or burn it. Florida claims it has poured over $20 billion into the Florida schools and they're just about the worst in the country. Money is NOT the answer to fixing the educational system. You can build the best schools, hire the best teachers, serve the most healthy lunches, but if the kids don't want to learn, you will ultimately fail. The solution doesn't start with money, it starts with motivating the kids to want to learn. This may seem racist, and maybe it is, but the whole educational mess began with the integration of the schools. Because the minority kids were so far behind, some genius came up with the idea of watering down the requirements to get passing grades. It has been a downhill journey since.

And the news just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?

Here's something that should scare the hell out of you: Newborns' blood used to build secret DNA database.

Can you give examples of how the President and Democrats have not been fierce advocates for the civil rights of gay and lesbian Americans?

Deleting his gay civil rights promise from the White House Web site.

Changing his commitment to “repeal” Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, to “changing DADT in a sensible manner.”

Repeatedly defending DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) in court, including just a few weeks ago, even though he didn’t have to.

Making jokes about marriage equality, which President Obama claims he doesn't support, even though he once did.

Comparing gay relationships to incest and pedophilia in a Justice Department brief.

Joking about gay protesters upset about the DOMA brief.

Refusing to provide health care benefits to the partners of gay employees, and then claiming hat DOMA precludes it, when it does not.

Refusing to meet with gay legal groups to discuss how to provide such health benefits within the confines of DOMA.

Claiming that health benefits for partners of federal employees were new, then being caught in a lie.

Much, much more.

Here's another chance for Obama to prove he'll implement change: Lawmakers Punt Patriot Act to Obama. Wanna bet on whether or not he signs it? Well, by now you should know that he did indeed sign it. More change we can believe in?

Big Brother is closing in: Leaked ACTA draft reveals plans for internet clampdown. ISPs must snoop on subscribers or face being sued by content owners

Tracy Residents Now Have To Pay For 911 Calls

A Virginia man and his wife were driving home one very cold night when the wife asked her husband to stop the car. There was a baby skunk lying at the side of the road, and she got out to see if it was still alive. It was, and she said to her husband, "It's nearly frozen to death. Can we take it with us, to get it warm, and let it go in the morning?" He says, "O.K. Get in the car with it." "Where shall I put it to get it warm?" He says, "Put it in between your legs. It's nice and warm there." "But what about the smell?" "Just hold its little nose."

Three old ladies and their dogs were sitting on a park bench having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached from across the park. The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them and opened his trench coat. Gertrude immediately had a stroke. Then Maude also had a stroke. But Tillie, being older and more feeble, couldn't reach that far.

What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A small medium at large.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Restos du Coeur

On the initiative of Peter, I, too, will participate in this chain of solidarity.

This is to help the “Restos du Coeur” (“Restaurants of the Heart”) - founded by the comedian Coluche in 1985 - of which the main activity is to distribute food packages and hot meals, a place to sleep... to the needy (some 800.000 people assisted each year). Sponsored by Carrefour and Danone, and by writing a few words like this, 10 meals will be offered. (You must send a link to: hub@lanetscouade.com).

By suggesting other bloggers to do the same thing, 10 multiplied by... additional meals will be offered. I ask all of you who would like to help, to continue the chain. I suggest also that you all visit this page and this page (in French).

À la prochaine, mes amis

RIP Little Mouse

I am sad to report that our little mouse is dead. Apparently, he never got out of the car. We entered the car a few days ago and it smelled really terrible. We immediately assumed it was the poor little mouse, and upon searching between the seats, found his body. I'm not the sentimental type, but I'm really sorry he died.

We were shopping at our local market the other day, when I saw some acorn squash. I've been curious about it for some time, and finally decided to buy one (one could easily feed four). I've never had it before and wasn't sure what to expect, but thought it would be different than the regular yellow squash we usually get. It takes over and hour to bake it and it tastes very similar to the regular squash. I'm not sure it's really worth the effort. It's easy enough to prepare, once you manage to cut it in half, but an hour to bake is a bit much.

Food Stamps Create Jobs… in India!

I've never seen a branch curl up like this one.

Priceless

How long till we wipe out HIV for good?

It’s Official: Google Can Sell Power Like a Utility. Read More.

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Mouse Emergency

David Hallyday (Johnny's Son) - Tu Ne M'as Pas Laissé Le Temps

The Mouse Saga continues. I walked into the kitchen one day and found him (I hope it's a 'him') on the counter, so I'm now certain it is a mouse and not a rat. We bought a mouse trap; the kind that captures them but doesn't kill them. I followed the instructions and put some peanut butter in it and set it out where I figured he'd be running. After a couple of days, he was still running free, so I assumed he didn't like peanut butter. I cleaned out the trap and put in a small piece of cheese and a piece of a raisin cookie. Still, he would not enter the trap. Robb suggested I put it on the counter since there was all kind of evidence that was where he roamed. I did, and within hours he was trapped. This is where you'll probably roll on the floor laughing. I carried the trap down to the car to take him to his new home near a barbeque place. Well, I though at least he'd have a lot of stuff to eat there. As I was getting into the car, I dropped the trap and he came flying out. I have no idea if he is still in the car, or if he ran out the open door. I came back to the apartment. A few minutes later, one of the other residents knocked and told me that my car alarm was going off. I went down and tried to shut it off. Half an hour or so later, the same guy knocked and told me it was still going off. I went back down and found what I thought was the "off" button. Then I tried to find the manual. It was not in the car, so I had to trudge up to the apartment, where I found it in one of the bookcases. According to the manual, I pushed the correct button to turn off the alarm, and apparently it worked because no one came to complain about it after that. But I noticed in the manual that the alarm can be triggered by movement in the car. You don't think.....

This is so unique, so fantastic, so ingenious, you may not believe it's real!

Emergency: The Emergency Number worldwide for cell phones is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly, this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked.

Hey, look people, more change we can believe in: FBI wants records kept of Web sites visited.

Isn't it great to live in a country where "doing the right thing" is a valued virtue? Nurse to Stand Trial for Reporting Doctor

**********************

Bill worked in a pickle factory.. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer.

His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill said he would be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own.

One day a few weeks later, Bill came home and his wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. 'What's wrong, Bill?' she asked.

'Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?'

'Oh, Bill, you didn't' she exclaimed.

'Yes, I did.' he replied.

'My God, Bill, what happened?'

'I got fired.'

'No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?'

'Oh...she got fired too.'

The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did the first 'Marlboro Man'.

À la prochaine, mes amis

Feel Good Plan B

Another feel good moment that might not have happened according to Geoff. At the time he owned a club in Antwerp, the city government tried to have the station torn down. Geoff, and several thousand others, signed a petition in opposition to the government. They won, thankfully, and we get to enjoy this.

More than 200 dancers were performing their version of "Do Re Mi", in the Central Station of Antwerp. with just 2 rehearsals they created this amazing stunt! Those 4 fantastic minutes were performed 23 March, 2009, at 08:00 AM. It was a promotional stunt for a Belgian television program, where they were looking for someone to play the leading role in the musical "The Sound of Music".

Our market had a sale so we bought a dozen bottles of Pinot Grigio, our favorite white wine. Well, that and Sancerre.

The other day, while I was preparing dinner, I thought I saw, out of the corner of my eye, something run along the baseboards, but I convinced myself that I was just seeing shadows. It now turns out that we have a mouse or mice. It/they, have left conclusive evidence. We actually saw a mouse running about before we left for our aborted journey last September. but when we returned, there was no sign of it and we thought it had moved on to greener pastures. Evidently not. Now we have to devise a scheme to get rid of it/them. I don't like to kill them, so we'll get one of those traps that captures them alive and then find it a new home somewhere else.

Time for Plan B. I saw it for real this time and it's much too large to be a mouse. Hmmm, maybe it's time for Rent-A-Pussy.

This is rather cool, though I have to admit, I was over it by the 1:30 mark. Science: Auto-tuned.

12 Reasons Why Gay Marriage Should Be Illegal

Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, and birth control.

Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Infertile couples and old people can’t legally get married because the world needs more children.

Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

If gay marriage is allowed, straight marriage will be less meaningful (for instance, Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage).

Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are property, blacks can’t marry whites, and divorce is illegal.

Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of the minorities.

Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why single parents are forbidden to raise children.

Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. Heterosexual marriage has been around for a long time, and we could never adapt to new social norms because we haven’t adapted to things like women being allowed to vote or integrated schools.

Civil unions, providing most of the same benefits as marriage with a different name are better, because a “separate but equal” institution is always constitutional. Separate schools for African-Americans worked just as well as separate marriages for gays and lesbians will.

Video shows fighter jets shooting down US missionaries

One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife's arm.

The wife turns over and says 'I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.'

The husband, rejected, turns over.

A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. 'Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?'

À la prochaine, mes amis

Stupid Wish

One of the surprises about the apartment we rented in Paris, was that there was nothing in the kitchen. That was surprising, because in every apartment we've ever rented, there was something in the cabinets; at the very least, salt and pepper. Usually, we would find coffee, tea, sugar and sometimes dry food items that had been left behind by previous renters. But this time...nothing. So, Robb bought some salt and pepper. Why is that even a topic of discussion one might ask? Well, the other night I made what I call Oriental Beef and Noodles (even though I don't use beef) and I used the pepper bought in Paris. I thought it was just regular black pepper and I didn't use very much of it. That's a good thing because this stuff is powerful hot. I had thought I might use diced tomatoes with green chilis, good thing I changed my mind about that. I like spicey food, but I detest foods that are so hot you can't taste anything and your only experience is that of burning your mouth.
I know it's difficult to tell from this picture taken from our balcon, but this is a neon martini glass. The thing is, if you're having a party and you want to invite everyone in the complex, you place this in your window and everyone knows to show up for drink, and fun. Okay, not really. I just made that up, but it's a cool idea don't you think?
The World Health Organisation and the pharmaceutical industry have been criticised for their handling of last year's swine flu pandemic. At a hearing of the Council of Europe - the European Union's human rights body - the WHO faced accusations that it exaggerated the danger of the virus under pressure from drug companies. When a pandemic was declared last June, most European countries changed their health priorities to accommodate thousands of expected patients. A number of European governments had signed contracts with the drug companies to buy back vaccines, believing a flu pandemic long predicted by health experts would be a virus-like bird flu with a very high death rate. But swine flu, it is now clear, is a mild flu with a lower mortality than seasonal influenza. The organisation denies any conflict of interest. - BBC
Obama: Stop Filling Administration with RIAA Insiders. Nearly two dozen public interest groups, trade pacts and library groups urged President Barack Obama on Thursday to quit filling his administration with insiders plucked from the Recording Industry Association of America. Read More.
Why I'd rather be punched in the testicles than call customer service.
On my Wish List:

À la prochaine, mes amis

International Idiots

I LOVE this song (please note that I DID NOT use the word 'heart'!)

I went for my semi-decade eye examination a few days ago, the last time was about ten years ago. They have a new female eye doctor at the place we usually have that done. She is very thorough. She discovered that I have a hole in my eye which could be the beginning of glaucoma, or something I've had forever. She's not sure because no one has ever examined my eyes as closely as she did. I don't know whether to be happy or devastated. As you know, glaucoma can lead to blindness if not treated soon enough. I would not like to be deaf, but I could cope with that a lot more easily than blindness. Oh, and I got new glasses since I somehow managed to lose my others.

A year, or more ago, I signed up for Comcast's paperless statements and billing. Since then, every month like clockwork, I get.....yep, you guessed it, by USPS mail each and every month, a paper bill and a notice that I've signed up for paperless billing. Can we say STUPID?
Hmm, now we understand why the US is interested in Haiti and why there are over 20,000 troops stationed there; they're certainly not there to distribute food. If they are, they're doing a really poor job, because the people that need it aren't getting it.. No, I think this is more likely: Haiti is full of oil say Daniel and Ginette Mathurin
IDIOT SIGHTING - Just in case you think Americans have it locked up - I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the Highways Department to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.' Story from Potters Bar, Herts , UK
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said , 'Where am I , Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
Church Bulletins:
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
À la prochaine, mes amis